Our Pool Days

Around 2.5 months, when life with Lexi started getting easier and she could tolerate being out for a short periods of time, we started taking the time out of our day to go to the pool. These trips were mostly for me, to be honest. I needed to get out of the house and the closest thing, without getting Lexi into a car seat, was our community clubhouse and pool. Alexis has never been the kind of baby that would just tag along wherever I go. So at first I kept it short. We’d leave right after she woke up and spend no more than an hour, at most. I wouldn’t be able to even get in the water. It was just to go somewhere, to get out of the house. One of these outings, my mom stayed with Alexis in the shade and Andrew and I went swimming, just the two of us. It was AMAZING! It was the first time we did something as a couple again, and we had so much fun for that half an hour we played around in water. We laughed till our bellies hurt, and splashed and jumped and just hugged and talked. We won’t get another chance to do that until my mom comes back in January.

 

Alexis LOVED looking at the water. We didn’t have her get in the pool, since it’s not recommended till 6 months of age, but we would sit on the edge of the pool for a few minutes when the sun goes behind the clouds and look at the water in awe. I cannot wait for my water baby to be old enough to splash around.

{FYI: There are two reasons that I know of why little babies shouldn’t swim in public pools, chlorinated pools or natural bodies of water (like ocean or lake). One is that their skin is VERY absorbent for the first 6 months of life. Much more absorbent than an adult’s skin. Which means any chemicals (chlorine) will be readily absorbed into their bloodstream ( that is the only the reason for why we went with organic clothing for the first 6 months of her life). The second reason applies to public pools and oceans/lakes- there’re a ton of e.coli bacteria found each season in oceans, and lakes can be even worse with all kind of flesh eating bacteria and Naegleria Fowleri ( that sci-fi sounding bug that lives in lakes and enters through your nose and eats your brain- I KNOW RIGHT?)
Now, granted, the flesh eating bacteria and the brain bug can harm an adult just as easily, but infants are more susceptible to e.coli and other more benign every day bacteria that an adult might fight off. In addition to that, there’s always the issue of overheating and sun exposure. Most sunblocks also state that they should be used starting at 6 months of age ( most likely for the first reason I outlined above). So it just makes sense to keep the little ones out of the water and in the shade for half a year, before they get stronger.

Additional Info from Megan from The Memoirs of Megan: Babies before 6 months of age have a harder time regulating their body temperature. To place them even in “warm pools” of 88-90 degrees (which most public pools are kept between 82-86 unless states that it is a warm water “therapy pool”) is lowering their core body temperature by over 8 degrees. That’s huge for an infant! Around 6 months of age is when scientifically, infants can control their own body temperature better.
Also, they have proper head control. Yes, my daughter was able to hold her head up unassisted at 2 months, however, some babies cannot, so 6 months is the typical age that the ARC and YMCA wait until.
But like E said, the biggest reason is that public pools are DIRTY (wanna know what’s worse? Hot tubs) Public pools use chlorine (bleach) to “Clean” the water, and muriatic acid to keep the pH (acidity level) in check. Even salt water pools must use muriatic acid. With your infant’s skin being so absorbent, it’s just not recommended. e coli and cripto can kill an adult, why risk it with a newborn? }

Now that Alexis is nearing her 6 months birthday, I am getting more and more excited about introducing her to the cool water of the pool and warm waters of the Gulf of Mexico. She grew out of all of her swimsuits pretty much before I was able to try them on her, so I am shopping for new ones, but I cannot find anything as cute as these adorable Lourdes one pieces. There are some cute bikinis, but I think at this age, I might as well just have her wear a swim diaper. Once she can walk, we’ll see if we can find some cute bikinis.

Now mama (that’s me) herself is completely out of bikinis that fit her chest unless she wants to look like a pornstar ( which she doesn’t). I just ordered 4 new bikinis (FINALLY!) and cannot wait for the them to come some time next week. I am excited and scared at the same time, because in the past I could rely on everything fitting me exactly like the model on the pictures, now it’s a bit different (hopefully not for long) with me having to try and picture what it’s going to look like on me. We’ll see, we’ll see….

I have more pool photos coming up from our recent pool playdate and Father’s Day.

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106 Comments

  • Reply
    Ori
    July 16, 2012 at 8:40 AM

    uuuh, cute little lexi ?

  • Reply
    Katherine
    July 16, 2012 at 9:59 AM

    Those swimsuits are probably the cutest I’ve seen for babies, especially that adorable ducky one. Did you buy them online or at a store around you?

    I know you’re wanting to stick more towards organic clothing, but Target has a BUNCH of infant swim suits on sale on their website. They’re cheap enough to buy a few and not have to worry about keeping them around for next year when she’s older.

    If you’re still wanting organic and can’t find anything (or don’t want to shell out an arm and a leg for a suit she’ll only wear for a short period of time) I’d definitely just use the swim diaper. There’s something very cute about a chubby little one in a diaper wading in the water. 🙂

    Have fun!

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 10:12 AM

      I haven’t found any organic swimsuits, so we’ve been using conventional ones. Lourdes swimsuits are the cutest, I bought them on Zulily but can’t find them anywhere anymore!

  • Reply
    Rachel
    July 16, 2012 at 10:39 AM

    You won’t be able to have alone time with your hubby till January? That’s so sad. Get a sitter and go on a date. It’s very important to have that time together.

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 10:50 AM

      Why? If all we’ll be doing is talking about Lexi and missing her? We are both enjoying time with her. Why have kids, if you can’t sacrifice a little bit alone time for a year or two?

      • Reply
        Misty
        July 16, 2012 at 10:56 AM

        I SO agree with you, Elena! My husband and I are huge Resident Evil fans and are really sad that the 5th movie is coming out in September and we won’t be seeing it. But we simply just don’t want to give up the time with Braeden to do it, and he’ll be a year old at that time! Sure, he’d be fine with my parents, but I just don’t want to do it. We both work (my husband is a photographer who sets his own schedule, so he stays with Braeden when I’m at my job as a school counselor), but one of us is ALWAYS with him. Twice when my husband was very busy he did spend the time I was working with my parents, but that is it. I just can’t being myself to leave him unless I have to. I’ll never understand why people are always trying to make kids fit into the mold they want them to fit in, and make them be “convenient” to their lives. To me, I chose to have a child and that means I choose to make sacrifices for him.

        Of course sometimes people do need to take a break for a bit and I don’t mean that. Sometimes it can be intense! But that’s why there are two of you, so you can trade off when need be.

        Love it! Brae had his first pool time last weekend 🙂 He’s almost 10 months old.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 16, 2012 at 11:42 AM

          “I’ll never understand why people are always trying to make kids fit into the mold they want them to fit in, and make them be “convenient” to their lives. To me, I chose to have a child and that means I choose to make sacrifices for him.” i

          My thinking exactly! I knew what having a child would entail in terms of personal time. We’ll have plenty of that time when she is a bit older, but right now we choose to enjoy this awesome creation of ours.

          • Ashley
            July 16, 2012 at 2:02 PM

            Yes, but you could go out after she is asleep. When we have date nights we go through our sons normal night time routine and then go out after he is in bed. He goes to bed at 7pm and doesn’t wake up until 2-3 am for a feed.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 16, 2012 at 2:09 PM

            That’s something I would do, except for Alexis goes to sleep at 8-9pm and wakes up every 30 minutes till about 10. And then she wakes up every 1-2 hours. So that’s a no-go for us until we can be sure she can sleep through the night.

          • Ashley
            July 16, 2012 at 3:32 PM

            Ah yes, hopefully she starts to sleep better for you soon. My son didn’t start his good sleeping until about 6 months of age (he is 8 months old now). Just wanted to throw the idea of going out after bed out there!

      • Reply
        Lauren N
        July 16, 2012 at 11:08 AM

        I totally agree with this!! People keep pressuring my husband and I to leave our daughter, who just turned 3 months. This is SUCH a short period of time in their lives where they are so vulnerable, what’s the rush to leave them with someone else!?

        • Reply
          Melody
          July 16, 2012 at 11:49 AM

          Ya I also agree with this. I don’t want to leave my son. Sometimes I get overwhelmed and I hand him off to my husband to take care of for an hour. But then I come running out of the bath wanting him back!!
          I hate when people make you feel bad about wanting to spend all your time with you babies. They are only young for such a short period of time!
          I didn’t have a baby to have someone else raise him or take care of him. Now I am lucky enough that my husband can afford to take care of us on just his income.

          IF we were to go out for a night just my husband and I the whole time I would be thinking and worrying about my baby so why on earth would I leave him with anyone.

          • Elise
            July 16, 2012 at 11:07 PM

            Wow, that’s not offensive to any working moms or moms who do go on dates. This is coming from a stay at home mom. I would hope that you have enough impact on your child that someone else watching them for a bit does not mean they are raising them. Whatever works for you works for you, but this “I didn’t have a baby to have someone else raise him or take care of him. Now I am lucky enough that my husband can afford to take care of us on just his income.” is a bit much.

            I stay at home as well and am very thankful for that, but I also take time to go out with my husband, because when we are at home which is 95% of the time we are wrapped up in loving, playing, and teaching her. So that when we do go out to get our time she knows very much that she is loved and we will be back to care for her. I’m glad what you are doing works for you and your husband, but maybe next time think about your comments and how they come off.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 17, 2012 at 10:42 AM

            Elise,

            what I think Melody and many girls mean here is that we despise the “advice” that you SHOULD leave your baby home and go have fun alone with your husband. Many of us, along with our husbands, knew what we were getting ourselves into while getting pregnant and are prepared to not have alone time for a while. If it’s happens to work that you can go on a date, we’ll all take it, but we don’t think it’s a necessary thing. I personally believe that a marriage and a strong relationship can be fostered by caring for your baby together, not just going out to dinner.

            Women really need to stop taking everything other people say as an offense. Let’s all mind our own business.

          • Rebecca
            July 17, 2012 at 12:34 PM

            Elise – I couldn’t agree more. Haven’t any of you ever heard the metaphor “The best piece of parenting advice I’ve ever heard is from flight attendants. If things get really tough, grab your own oxygen mask first.” ? I would be anxious to check in with each of your marriages in a few years to see how your husbands felt about not spending any alone time with their wives for the first 2+ years of their childs’ life. No one is saying that spending time as a couple, with your child, isn’t worthwhile or “enough”, but time alone as adults is important too. Very important.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 17, 2012 at 2:36 PM

            You have to remember that not everyone is the same. Some feel the overwhelming need to have adult time, other couples mutually agree that they’d rather not leave the baby with someone else just to go out to dinner. How you feel and what you think isn’t necessarily what others people feel and think.

            Most people and “experts” say that for a healthy marriage you need “personal” space and “personal time”, yet my husband and I have worked, lived and played together for the last 9 years without spending a day apart ( except for the period of time when I was working in NYC) and we couldn’t be happier and neither one of us feels or ever felt the need for “personal space”. We got married to be together, so we see no point in being apart- we have too much fun, same thing with our baby- we had our baby to enjoy her together, so why would we necessarily put her into someone else’s care who we don’t even trust just to go eat some oily unhealthy dinner or watch a movie with no redeeming qualities that we could watch at home in our dedicated movie theater. To each his own.

          • Melody
            July 17, 2012 at 12:51 PM

            Yes I was raised in daycares as my mom was a single mom. I missed her a lot and wished she could have been the one to stay at home with us. Thankfully we had awesome people taking care of us but I want to be that for my son.
            Don’t take things so personally. If you feel comfortable leaving your kid. Good for you. But I (emphasis on I) don’t feel like that yet. Right now I want to be the one who comforts him, changes him and puts him to bed. Maybe in a couple months it will change.
            If we didn’t have the money for me to stay home then we would have to deal with that situation but I am very lucky that I can. Also my husband and I have a solid relationship and dinner together with our baby is enough for us right now. He also hates leaving our baby when he’s home since he’s gone all day and misses him when he’s at work.

            Don’t make a bigger deal out of what I’m saying. We all do our own things and feel comfortable with different things. I never said women who work are horrible. I just knew when having a baby I wanted to be his sole caretaker.

          • Rebecca
            July 17, 2012 at 5:19 PM

            ” just to go eat some oily unhealthy dinner or watch a movie with no redeeming qualities that we could watch at home in our dedicated movie theater”

            You have GOT to be kidding me with this response.

          • Jennifer
            July 17, 2012 at 5:30 PM

            I don’t even understand this part of your response: “go eat some oily unhealthy dinner or watch a movie with no redeeming qualities”. First of all, do you not have healthy restaurants in your city, or any other options for adult activiites? Second, what does any of that have to do with Rebecca or Elise’s comments?

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 17, 2012 at 5:36 PM

            Huh?
            My point is there’s nothing we currently want to do on our own without Alexis. Any other activity we will just be wishing Alexis was with us experiencing it, too.
            We went to Orlando last weekend to our favorite amazing hotel we used to stay at back before we had a baby. We had family members around and yet all both of us wanted to do is walk around the grounds with Alexis and we had a blast. I really don’t get the push for leaving your kid at 6months to go have fun without her. We had 9 freaking years to do that and having fun kidless is exactly why we postponed having kids. Now that she is here, we want to experience life WITH her. As simple as that.

          • Brandee
            July 28, 2016 at 6:57 PM

            Elena, “We had 9 years..” I feel exactly the same way! We are currently expecting our first child after 19 years of it being “just the two of us”. Yay for birth control! So over going out and partying. We’re an adventurous couple, so if anything we’ll miss out on mountain biking and hiking. We are both looking forward to spending every second with our little one! This would not have been the case if we would have conceived much sooner in our relationship when having a social life and a career was very important. At 38 years old, I had a career, made careful economical choices and lived life to the fullest! I have everything paid off and can afford to devote all of my attention to our little one. My husband’s comment about going out, “Been there, done that!” These first years pass by SO QUICKLY! Again, I would not have felt this way earlier in life, which is why we too chose to POSTPONE having kids. It’s really about where you are in your life, your relationship and your financial situation. Nothing wrong with going out occasionally, but some parents plan their baby’s schedule around their life and we choose to plan our life around our baby. I majored in Early Childhood Education and I personally felt it was extremely important to stay at home and not have my child raised in a daycare. There is no way a daycare can provide the appropriate amount of love, attention and developmental activities that I know is crucial those first four years.

      • Reply
        Adge
        July 17, 2012 at 6:59 PM

        “Why have kids, if you can’t sacrifice a little bit alone time for a year or two?”

        I think you’re probably generalizing with this statement but its still a bit extreme. Considering how much fun you expressed that you had with your husband in the pool, I really don’t see how an hour away from Lexi once a month or even every couple of months is so unfathomable to you.

        My husband and I are homebodies and always have been. So we don’t feel the need to get a babysitter for our 6 month old just so we can go out. We also both work outside the home so we cherish the time we have with him. But even still, we went out to dinner once for our anniversary and we went to a wedding without DS (both times we left him with my in laws). Yes we missed him but it was nice being baby-free together for a change.

        I know every person, baby and couple are different, but implying that you shouldn’t have kids if you ever plan to leave them seems a bit extreme to me.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 7:23 PM

          Yes, of course, it’s a general statement. The point is we were prepared to sacrifice alone time. It’s a statement that we use on ourselves, not for other people. It’s not the time away from Lexi that bothers us the most ( though we don’t really want to be away from her for long), it’s the “not trusting anyone but family to look after her while she’s little”. In laws are fine if you trust them.

          As far as having fun with hubby in the pool- that was because we both could see Lexi a few feet away from us with my mom. When my mom comes back to visit, we’ll definitely do more of these small “dates”.

          • Adge
            July 17, 2012 at 9:04 PM

            I think your reasoning makes all the difference here. If you don’t want to leave Lexi because you have no one close by that you trust to watch her then that’s completely different than what you were implying which is that now that you have a baby you can do nothing but devote every thought/breath/move to said baby.

            If I had no trustworthy babysitter I absolutely wouldnt leave my son for anything. Luckily I have a lot of family close by.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 17, 2012 at 9:16 PM

            No the implication you’re referring to was said in the context of responding to “you HAVE to leave your baby to have alone time” which I don’t agree with since we knew well what we were getting ourselves into. If my mom were here, we would be happy to leave her as long as she takes a bottle or by then can be fed solids, but only for a couple of hours at first.

    • Reply
      Rachel
      July 16, 2012 at 2:14 PM

      Maybe I think a bit differently because my son is two. I’m always giving things up and adjusting because I have a child. BUT I also have a husband that I love to spend time with alone. We don’t get out much but we try to do dinner or something at least once a month without little man. It’s good for everyone. Everyone is different though.

      • Reply
        Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
        July 16, 2012 at 2:41 PM

        Don’t get me wrong- we LOVED going places just the two of us. But with a new baby, all you want is to share experiences with her. I see us needing some alone time when she’s 2, but not now. She’s our focus.

  • Reply
    Jessica
    July 16, 2012 at 10:42 AM

    Love that stroller! You look fab!

  • Reply
    sarah
    July 16, 2012 at 11:12 AM

    I think i have left my girls alone once with a sitter that wasnt my relative. I just dont feel comfortable with it, also both my girls are super clingy so dates that we have been on haven’ t been extreme.ly long. I dont find it strange at all to want to wait with babysitters…even though you may not be getting out alone you can still spend quality time with your husband watching movies, playing games, ect….i dont know why people make such a big deal out of it-right!? A baby is so small and needy for such a short period of time, as long as your not ignoring eachother (which i highly doubt you are) its worth it for your daughter!

  • Reply
    Jolene (www.everydayfoodie.ca)
    July 16, 2012 at 11:49 AM

    Wow – you lost your baby weight FAST!!! You look incredible!

  • Reply
    Erica
    July 16, 2012 at 11:54 AM

    Huh… The “how to teach your baby to swim” book and our doc said it was fine. Funny how All the “experts” contradict each other about everything. I guess it is just so normal in our culture that we don’t really think twice about it, really.

    • Reply
      Megan
      July 16, 2012 at 2:23 PM

      I wouldn’t consider a doctor (who is not a trained aquatic professional) and a book to be ‘experts” in the field. Take the two largest swim lesson providers in America: The American Red Cross, and the YMCA. Both of their swim lesson programs for babies start at 6 months. This is for the reason that Elena mentioned above, as well as a few more:
      Babies before 6 months of age have a harder time regulating their body temperature. To place them even in “warm pools” of 88-90 degrees (which most public pools are kept between 82-86 unless states that it is a warm water “therapy pool”) is lowering their core body temperature by over 8 degrees. That’s huge for an infant! Around 6 months of age is when scientifically, infants can control their own body temperature better.
      Also, they have proper head control. Yes, my daughter was able to hold her head up unassisted at 2 months, however, some babies cannot, so 6 months is the typical age that the ARC and YMCA wait until.
      But like E said, the biggest reason is that public pools are DIRTY (wanna know what’s worse? Hot tubs) Public pools use chlorine (bleach) to “Clean” the water, and muriatic acid to keep the pH (acidity level) in check. Even salt water pools must use muriatic acid. With your infant’s skin being so absorbent, it’s just not recommended. e coli and cripto can kill an adult, why risk it with a newborn?

      • Reply
        Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
        July 16, 2012 at 2:46 PM

        You know I really appreciate you chiming in. If you don’t mind I’ll add that bit to the post, ok (with proper credit of course)?

        • Reply
          Megan
          July 17, 2012 at 12:35 AM

          🙂 Anytime.

  • Reply
    kris
    July 16, 2012 at 12:05 PM

    What kind of stroller is that?

  • Reply
    Sam
    July 16, 2012 at 12:07 PM

    Just thought you’d want to know, you have some serious camel toe going on in that first set of bikini pics! D:

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 12:54 PM

      Yes I know. It’s just a part of woman’s anatomy. No big deal. Everyone gets those once in a while 😉

    • Reply
      Danielle Kowalski
      July 16, 2012 at 2:34 PM

      Wow…you have 32 pictures in this post, and of course someone would try to find SOMETHING negative to say about the two bikini pics. iIf this is all they can come up with, you must be doing something right 🙂

      • Reply
        Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
        July 16, 2012 at 2:45 PM

        32? Whoa! Really? You counted haha!
        🙂

        • Reply
          Danielle Kowalski
          July 16, 2012 at 4:02 PM

          Haha… I’m a little “photo” holic … I love all of your pictures. And I think the snarky comments are getting so old. I just don’t get why people follow bloggers just to hate on them. I guess it’s a twisted form of flattery 😉

    • Reply
      lucja
      July 16, 2012 at 7:17 PM

      “serious” camel toe? wow you can barely see it unless you’re looking for it or zoomed in really far. and any rate, visible or not, i agree its part of a woman’s body! women shouldn’t be ashamed. way to scrutinize.

  • Reply
    Tara
    July 16, 2012 at 12:19 PM

    how fun! I love how informative you are! You have really helped save me time on researching, and also helped me see things I would have never thought of (no swimming until 6 months old!) thanks so much! And I love these pictures! Lexi is so cute! adorable swimsuits!

  • Reply
    Pinkcell
    July 16, 2012 at 1:16 PM

    I must say your post baby body is amazing, I have the same height and weight as you but my belly is not that flat! When will you post on your fitness plan since Lexi was born? Btw, Lexi looks adorable in these swinsuits

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 1:39 PM

      Thank you!
      I gotta tell you though I can’t take credit for anything. I have not been able to work out at all. The pics in this post are from 2-3 months ago and at that point I hadn’t even lost all the baby weight.
      The only thing I can say is being very healthy and FIT going into pregnancy and lightly staying in shape throughout is what helped me. Otherwise, I’m still to this day 4 lbs above my prepregnancy weight, even though I now look much thinner than these pictures at 2.5 months PP.
      I also think that not eating meat, chicken or dairy is contributing to it. It’s so easy to lose weight being vegan (even though I’m not 100% vegan since I eat certain fishes).

      I will do a post as soon as i am working out regularly again, but all I’ll be doing really is running/rollerblading and pilates. I am huge believer in healthy nutrition as a weight loss tactic over exercising yourself to death. I only do exercise to stay healthy and get some tone ( which I need so bad)

  • Reply
    Elena C.
    July 16, 2012 at 1:43 PM

    My pretty girly girls 🙂
    I wanna have some pool/sea time too lol
    Cannot wait!
    Oh I totally wouldn’t even notice the “camel toe” if it wasn’t mentioned! Is that what evokes commenters’ feelings? Seriously??

  • Reply
    Lara
    July 16, 2012 at 1:47 PM

    Hey! Once she’s actually active in the water a bit, you might want to look into a rash guard or something that covers their shoulders and legs a bit – especially with the very fair skin that you and your hubs have (and Alexis looks like she’s inherited) – just like our family. The water makes the sun’s rays much stronger. We slather sunblock on, but I still want to avoid ANY chance of a burn and limit the exposure as much as possible. We had a knee/elbow length one from http://www.swimoutlet.com/ that I liked but it looks like it’s out of stock. I then got this one from Old Navy:

    http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=54292&vid=1&pid=107414&scid=107414002 (on sale for $10!)

    …and am pretty happy with it for $10. I know how you feel about Old Navy, but worth checking out. 🙂

    Don’t forget sunblock on her scalp and ears! We wear a sunhat most of the time, even in the water.

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 1:54 PM

      Thanks! That’s a great tip! How do you put sunblock on scalp? Just rub it in?

      We’ll probably use a hat anyways, but rashguard is a must. I am looking for a UPF50+ one but that doesn’t contain chemicals…

      • Reply
        Lara
        July 16, 2012 at 2:35 PM

        Yeah, just rub it in. We use “safe” sunscreens from Badger Baby and Blue Lizard, so it’s all a cream or a stick. It makes their hair disgusting, but better gross greasy hair than a burned scalp!! (And it washed out easily). I’ve been searching for a spray, which would be easier, but haven’t found a baby-safe one.

        I’m not sure that they make SPF clothes in a chemical-free version. :/ It’s a trade off for sure, but I just read a study linking even the earliest sun exposure/burns to cancer, so I’d rather err on the side of the coverage than the chemicals.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 16, 2012 at 2:46 PM

          Agreed!

          • Xxx
            July 16, 2012 at 4:45 PM

            Gap makes a rash guard that has spf50 built into it…my son got one at my shower

  • Reply
    Michelle
    July 16, 2012 at 3:06 PM

    For someone who isn’t “just a mom”, that’s exactly what you are. There is no need to be a mommy martyr. Having alone time is healthy and needed. Your husband needs your attention you. A couple truly in love WANT to spend time together. I would be concerned if my spouse didn’t feel the need to have some alone time with me. That speaks volumes of a relationship. Luckily, I have a husband who agrees with me.

    Your baby doesn’t need you as much as you like to think. 2 YEARS with no dates?? I cannot imagine. And FWIW, leaving her at 2 will be harder. If she is around you 24/7, she will be overly clingy that she will likely have a huge meltdown when you try to leave her. Walking away from a child screaming “mommy” will be MUCH harder than leaving a baby who won’t even know you’re gone.

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 3:38 PM

      I am not even going to reply to this one. It’s useless.

      • Reply
        Xxx
        July 16, 2012 at 4:50 PM

        She is SPOT on…it isn’t useless…Just wait until she is 10 months old and you can’t even go to the bathroom alone without a meltdown…imagine what THAT will be like for an entire night, do you really want to put her thought that?? 2 year olds don’t understand that your coming back, in her mind you will be leaving her forever.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 16, 2012 at 4:59 PM

          My useless comment wasn’t in regards to that part. I fully understand separation anxiety- I’m not arguing with that even for a second. I actually have that now. She is 5 months and I can’t go to a bathroom without her crying as soon as I leave her sight.

        • Reply
          Jessica
          July 17, 2012 at 3:01 PM

          Not true at all. I didn’t leave my daughter with anyone else until she was 2 years old. My husband and I left her with my mom so we could attend childbirth classes (once a week for 8 weeks). She did great! She loved spending time with grandma.

    • Reply
      Regina Vanata
      July 16, 2012 at 5:50 PM

      Looks to me like she and her husband spend a LOT of time together, WITH Alexis. What’s wrong with that? :-/

  • Reply
    Michelle
    July 16, 2012 at 3:11 PM

    And your baby’s skin isn’t a sponge. Nothing will get to there bloodstream unless you’re injecting the chlorine with a needle. The same “germs” can harm her the same at 5 months and 6 months. That month isn’t some magical shift that happens. What a load of rubbish.

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 3:37 PM

      You’re SO wrong on this one, it’s not even funny! Way to be ignorant! We aren’t talking “germs”, we’re talking toxins. Before you open your mouth, try researching a few things first.

      • Reply
        Michelle
        July 17, 2012 at 1:42 AM

        So your saying your tap water that you bathe her in doesn’t have fluorine? Even with a filter, it doesn’t take that out. Try believing more than you read on the internet. Just because you read one book or article doesn’t make it true. Please site a reputable pediatric association website or medical website that supports your claim.

      • Reply
        Michelle
        July 17, 2012 at 1:42 AM

        So your saying your tap water that you bathe her in doesn’t have fluorine? Even with a filter, it doesn’t take that out. And that’s still a chemical. Try believing more than you read on the internet. Just because you read one book or article doesn’t make it true. Please site a reputable pediatric association website or medical website that supports your claim.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 7:40 AM

          Michelle, Fluoride is not an issue. Chlorine and other chemicals are. There’s nothing harmful in a good tap water supply but there are plenty of chemicals in conventional pools.
          It’s fine that you want to ignore the facts but to say that what we are saying isn’t true is like saying toxins don’t cause cancer (which I’m sure you also believe).
          If I cared to take the time to find the source to prove it to you, I’d do it. But based on all the ignorant comments you’ve made over the months of reading my blog, I won’t waste my time.

          Btw, I don’t do my research “on the internet”.

          So continue keeping your mind closed, sweetheart.

          • Lara
            July 18, 2012 at 7:53 AM

            Tap water is chlorinated.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 18, 2012 at 8:33 AM

            Not to a degree where it would pose a danger

  • Reply
    Crystal
    July 16, 2012 at 3:40 PM

    I started taking my son in our pool at 2-3 months, we have a saltwater system so I thought it would be ok. I kept him in the shade and dressed him in a baby rashguard. He loved it so much! I figured it couldn’t be any worse than the tap water we bathe him in because I can swim underwater with my contacts in and it doesn’t irritate them. He won’t be 6 months until October and by then the pool will be closed because it’ll be cold. 🙁 I wish I lived in a warm climate year round, you’re so lucky! I hate the cold.

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 16, 2012 at 4:12 PM

      Saltwater system is the best thing you can do. We had a little swim with Lexi a week or so ago in a saltwater pool. I think that’s a pretty good alternative, as long as you take care of other things mentioned.

      • Reply
        tarynkay
        July 17, 2012 at 4:31 PM

        Ok- I don’t have an opinion as to whether or not you take your baby swimming before six months. I didn’t, but that’s mostly b/c it was winter here when he was born and there weren’t any opportunities to do so. I was raised in SW FL and swimming with tiny babies is something I grew up with and would have considered normal and safe. BUT saltwater pools are not actually chlorine-free. So if you want to avoid exposing Alexis to chlorine, you should avoid those, too. Here is a link that explains how they work: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Salt_water_chlorination

        Also, you cited the opinion of another blogger in the post. I clicked on the link to her blog and it just says that she’s a 27 year old first time mom? I’m not saying that she doesn’t know what she’s talking about, just that I’m not sure why her opinion would be expert?

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 5:23 PM

          I’m not saying she’s an expert (neither am I), we are just sharing some knowledge we have acquired and what we are doing for our kids and why. From what I know her job was in an aquatic field.
          Megan, feel free to correct me.

          Oh and do you know how hard it’s been to keep myself from taking Lexi to the pool here in Florida? Super hard! I’d probably give in if it wasn’t for my husband who is stronger in matters like that sometimes (I like to have fun too much)

          Re:saltwater pools, I know that they convert salt to chlorine but I thought it was at a different amounts? I’m not sure, Megan will know.

          • Megan
            August 16, 2012 at 1:43 PM

            Just saw this. Aside from teaching swim lessons for over 14 years, I ran and operated swimming pools for both the YMCA, the Army, and the city rec department. I have my bachelors in recreation management, and am a certified master trainer for lifeguarding and swim lesson instructor trainers for the YMCA curriculum and the American Red Cross. I am also a certified pool operator, meaning I took classes (over 80 hours worth) of classes dealing specifically with pool chemicals, pump systems, and balance. I am also a certified lifeguard, swim instructor, and EMT.
            My previous job (before I was “just a 27 year old mom”) was managing a large aquatic center that saw over 1,000 patrons per day, managing the 45 staff that went along with it, as well as the maintenance of the pump room and chemicals.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 5:30 PM

          Thanks for the link, btw. I should have looked up salt water pools myself. We only had her in a salt pool once, a week or so ago. So no biggie.

          • tarynkay
            July 18, 2012 at 12:30 PM

            Oh, no, I don’t think it’s a big deal at all. I just know that you are very concerned about chemical exposure for Alexis, and many people believe that saltwater pools are not chlorinated. My parents have one, they are always explaining about it to people.

            I just asked about the other blogger’s expertise b/c in the post, what she said was italicized as if it was a quote from a book or something. I clicked on the link to her blog b/c I thought there might be more information about this there. There wasn’t, just cute baby photos. Generally it seems that when you state something (like X causes Y) you include a link to more info or where you got that info. I appreciate that b/c it allows me to do my own research. So that’s all.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 18, 2012 at 12:45 PM

            Yeah I know. It’s hard to source everything. I usually barely have time to post and am going off of something I read in a book I was reading months ago. So sourcing and linking only happens when I remember where I found the info.

  • Reply
    Anna
    July 16, 2012 at 6:02 PM

    The hottest mama in town 🙂

  • Reply
    Anna
    July 16, 2012 at 10:51 PM

    Why wudnt your mom moved to where u r permanently??

  • Reply
    Ciara
    July 17, 2012 at 3:33 AM

    I took my son swimming for the first time 10 days shy of 4 months. He absolutely loved it! My friend has a saltwater pool and doesn’t run any kind of chemical through it so I felt perfectly comfortable with him in the pool. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with waiting either. You have to do what you are comfortable with and there is no sense in doing anything else.

    The first time we left our son with anyone he was almost 6 months. Before that he had to wear a dental appliance and it had to be cleaned after feedings and I didn’t feel comfortable leaving someone else to do that. Once his lip repair was done and he didn’t wear the appliance anymore I felt comfortable with it. Even then it was someone that we have deemed as family. She may not be a blood relative but she is as much if not more of a family member to us than some of our actual families. Spending time together is definitely a good thing. We don’t get much of either just the two of us or family time as we like because of our work schedules. Any moment that I can spend with my family is cherished.

  • Reply
    Vic
    July 17, 2012 at 3:47 AM

    Hi
    I’ve just stumbled across your blog and have spent a fait bit of time reading it. It’s clear you are/were a model. I think you bear a striking resemblance to Bridget Hall who I think used to model for Ralph Lauren.
    I feel for you with Lexi’s sleeping at night. It is not easy to get through a day with so much interrupted sleep! Have you considered with Lexi being a much larger than average baby she might not be getting as much food as she needs? Is she not hungry for more than breast milk? My third son is currently 6 and a bit months (born 6 Jan) and weighs 10kg (22lb). I started him on more than just milk at 17 weeks. In Australia, paediatricians currently follow a “not before 16 weeks and not after 26 weeks” method for weaning. From 4 months he has only been waking once a night, around 4am for a quick bottle and then sleeps again till 7am. Mostly though he sleeps from 7pm to 6am without a peep, a dummy or a crying session.
    You may think you are coping ok now but what about when you have your second or third baby and have to chase a toddler around on a few hrs sleep? I have a 3yo and. 5yo and I could not survive on that little sleep with three children.
    You might not be a fan of the cry it out method but honestly babies are SO much happier during the day when they get good solid sleep at night. you will be happier, she will be happier, win- win. I think most of the comments I’ve read are from mothers who FEEL for you and know how much better your experience could be. Ultimately not one of us has to be in your house getting up that many times so each to their own.

    • Reply
      Kim
      July 17, 2012 at 10:15 AM

      Alexis is growing beautifully on breast milk. My babies happened to be on the small side, on all breast milk before 6 months. All babies grow at their own pace.

      Ignore the haters, Elena.

      • Reply
        Alexandra
        July 17, 2012 at 11:10 AM

        Agree. Babies were designed to drink breastmilk and giving them something else (cereal, formula, etc) to get them to sleep all night is a myth. My baby is 15-months and has access to unlimited food and he doesn’t sleep all night. Is it hard? Sure, but it’s just become a reality that I’ve come to accept. He will get there in his own time and it’s not because I’m being a martyr. I want nothing more than good, solid sleep, but he still needs me at night
        And parenting doesn’t end once the sun goes down. I don’t know why other people are so concerned with everyone else’s kids’ sleeping habits. And I do realize that when babies 2 and 3 come along, we may have to do something differently. And I can tell you from personal experience, my ILs decided to do CIO with my son without my permission one night (can you guess who won’t be babysitting ever again) and he was clingy, anxious and terrified for several days after it. I don’t think people who decide to do CIO are bad parents, but it is not right for every kid or every family.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 11:32 AM

          ” it’s just become a reality that I’ve come to accept. He will get there in his own time and it’s not because I’m being a martyr. I want nothing more than good, solid sleep, but he still needs me at night”
          My thoughts exactly!

          “And I can tell you from personal experience, my ILs decided to do CIO with my son without my permission one night (can you guess who won’t be babysitting ever again) and he was clingy, anxious and terrified for several days after it.”
          OH MY GOD! I would HONESTLY never speak to them again. To do something like that to someone else’s baby is just beyond me. Parents and parents alone should decide what parenting methods to use on their baby, and care givers should follow that to a tee.

          • Alexandra
            July 17, 2012 at 9:58 PM

            I’m still angry and all future visits will be supervised. Their babysitting rights have been revoked.

  • Reply
    Julia
    July 17, 2012 at 6:26 AM

    Wow, you look amazing & Lexi is just such a cutie!!
    You teach me a lot about Babies and everything that comes with them, thanks for that!

  • Reply
    Tawny
    July 17, 2012 at 2:31 PM

    I guess the reason I don’t understand waiting is that 6 months is not some magical number. Infants are still infants at 6, 7, 8, etc months so they are still just as susceptible to bacteria or brain eating organisms (this is so rare anyway). None the less, she is your kid so whatever floats your boat. My kids were in a bunch of different bodies of water as newbies and we’re all still kicking.

    To the person who pointed out your camel toe, you are a moron. Everyone has camel toe in a bikini and why are you checking out someones vag anyway? I’m surprised no one has accused you of photo shopping your camel toe 😛

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 17, 2012 at 2:46 PM

      No an infant isn’t the same infant at 3,6 or 9 months.
      I wrote about it in the post.

      The 6 months is because it’s the age where their skin is no longer so porous so that chlorine and other chemicals in the pool don’t penetrate and get into your infant’s bloodstream. The bacteria is a different story all together. Infants are MUCH more susceptible to ecoli and at more risk of complications due to their immature immune system. In fact there’s a study that says that the longer infants don’t get exposed to public pools the fewer infections and ear infections they’ll have in their first year of life. Though I feel that for us 6 months is a good goal.
      And like Megan mentioned, 6 months also has to do with their ability to regulate body temperature.
      So THERE IS a lot that changes as infants grow and it’s up to each family to decide when they want to introduce their baby to pools as long as they are aware of risks and take precaution.

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 17, 2012 at 2:47 PM

      Oh just saw your camel toe bit!!!
      My husband said the same thing about photoshopping 🙂 lol

  • Reply
    Kay
    July 17, 2012 at 5:39 PM

    I’m so impressed that you’ve managed to keep such a healthy looking weight with exclusive bf-ing for so long – especially when you eat a vegan diet!

    I think I’m in the same kinda height/body range as you (I’m 5’11” and lanky – used to model as well for a few years!) and when my now 2 yo was bf-ing it really took its toll on me. I was down to 120lbs after about 2 months – my pedi kept telling me that I should give up for the sake of my own health. But I was eating – ALL the time!

    I’m expecting again now and would love to follow your example of exclusive bf-ing – how do you manage to keep your body weight up to a healthy level without pigging out on junk food lol?! (I also eat exclusively organic – mostly vegetarian but the occasional bit of free rang meat or fish).

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 17, 2012 at 5:56 PM

      Wow 120lbs! I looked incredibly thin at 128 , I can’t imagine 120.

      I’m really not doing anything special. I wish I’d actually lose some weight. I was never bone skinny before, I had some heft in legs (comparatively speaking).

      The ONLY thing that I’m doing Differently while breast feeding is taking a ton of supplements. I’m doing 500mg of calcium 3 times a day (since I don’t do dairy), prenatal with iron at night (at a different time than calcium), and a whole 4g of DHA a day (in additional to fatty fish that I eat).

      There’s nothing else really. I don’t eat junk, I don’t eat much at all, I haven’t been able to exercise…

      • Reply
        Rebekah
        July 17, 2012 at 8:07 PM

        I cut out dairy because I think it was making my daughter fussy. Just curious — what do you do for calcium? (A supplement?) I’ve been using almond milk and I know that has a lot of calcium but still trying to figure out what else works. Also, it would be very inspiring to see a post where you outline a typical day in terms of meals, snacks, etc. I know you’ve done some of that in the past on this blog, but wondering if you have different tips, types of food that work well now that you are breastfeeding, etc.

        Also, I am a ‘working’ mom (aren’t we all!) and just started back today after 9 weeks of maternity leave. I don’t understand why people care if you prefer to opt out of ‘date nights’ etc until you mom comes back. To each their own! I am planning on taking a girls night each week and a date night once a month with hubby (both AFTER she goes to sleep) but I’m absolutely not offended by your perspective – I think it makes sense and as you said, everyone is different. If people are confident in their own choices in terms of what works for them why should they mind if others do things their own way? I’m looking forward to a movie night here and there but, honestly, I usually have the most fun at home with my hubby and kiddos anyway.

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 8:14 PM

          “If people are confident in their own choices in terms of what works for them why should they mind if others do things their own way? ” I think this might be the key here.

          Re: Calcium, I take a supplement. 500mg 3 times a day. I definitely need to do a post about supplements and food. Though I don’t have much useful to say on food part, because I rarely have time to cook well and not something really fast (since Alexis is only NOW starting to play on her own and every second I have is precious). But I do have a supplement routine.
          You know I didn’t think almond milk had much calcium, but I might be wrong.
          Spinach has calcium, I believe. And I know many people think sardines are gross, but I have been a diligent eater of them since I got pregnant, because 1 can has 2g of Omega 3s and 25% of calcium (boned sardines).

          • Kay
            July 17, 2012 at 10:07 PM

            Oh love sardines! They are so great for Omegas and calcium. I thought you were vegan though :/

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 17, 2012 at 10:27 PM

            No my husband is vegan, I eat certain fishes for their benefit and protein (sardines, and rarely salmon). Oh and occasionally I eat free range eggs. Once I’m no longer breast feeding I’m most likely going to be vegan. We are super strict either. We’ll still eat something that contain trace amount of milk or maybe butter as long as other ingredients are ok (it’s mostly sweets though which we might need to cut out)

      • Reply
        Kay
        July 17, 2012 at 9:04 PM

        I know – that’s why I had to give up feeding exclusively 🙁 I just couldn’t seem to take in enough calories to feed my own body AND my baby’s. Obviously supplements are important – but they don’t contain calories, so perhaps I’ll just have to go back to a full carnivore diet!

        BTW Lexi looks and acts EXACTLY like my girl Lolly as a baby. Same eyes, hair, chubby arms, way of moving, everything! She started saying words at 6 months but refused to walk until she was nearly 1. She’s now nearly blonde (like me) and has super-blue eyes (like her dad). So, perhaps this is what you’ve got to look forward to!

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 17, 2012 at 10:30 PM

          I know supplements aren’t calories and this is nothing but me wondering, but what if by almost over supplementing (not really but just more than most take) your body doesn’t really need to pull those minerals from your tissues.
          I don’t think that’s how it works but who knows.
          I’d hate to have to go to a meat and dairy diet.
          Good luck!!!

      • Reply
        Alexandra
        July 18, 2012 at 10:12 AM

        What DHA supplement do you take? For me to get 4g, I’d have to take like 5 pills of mine. Also, do you have specific info about how much DHA pregnant and lactating women should be getting? I’ve never been able to find solid info. How much do/did you take before you were pregnant? Thanks!

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 18, 2012 at 10:23 AM

          I’ll have to post a link to it when I’m done rocking Lexi because I don’t remember the specific type but it’s by Nordic Naturals. Nordic is one of the few that do really good with purification process of dha (clear of mercury, metals and dioxins). In order to get in 4 g I have to take 2 pills 4 times a day or if I eat a can of sardines that day only twice a day.
          I read a Ton of stuff on dha but the reason why I take 4g rather than the 500mg or 1g for preg/lact women is the study that showed that the more dha women took the more benefit their breasted kids received in the cognitive and intellectual development. The improvement was in relation to how much DHA they took which was up to 4g. The study didn’t exceed the 4 grams so it might be as simple as the more you take the better it is even beyond 4g
          Once I do a post about it all, I’ll find the study and cite it.

          • tarynkay
            July 18, 2012 at 12:34 PM

            What do you do with the sardines? Just eat them out of the can? I would love to eat them more and am looking for ways to make them more palatable.

          • Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
            July 18, 2012 at 12:48 PM

            It depends on whether I have time. Sometimes just straight out of the can. They really taste like a better version of tuna. There’s an awesome pasta recipe somewhere on my blog (under cooking category) with sardines.
            I often put them on pumpernickel.
            I’m sure you can make a sardines version of tuna salad/sandwich

          • Crystal
            July 19, 2012 at 3:38 PM

            If you haven’t tried it, this is a great recipe for sardine spread and super simple. I love it on a sandwich.
            http://www.drweil.com/drw/u/RCP00183/Sardine-or-Kipper-Sandwich-Spread.html

        • Reply
          Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
          July 20, 2012 at 11:46 AM

          Ok, here’s the one I take right now: Nordic Naturals Pro DH 1000 I kept going back and forth between different Nordic Natural ones, but these worked out best.

  • Reply
    Elena
    July 17, 2012 at 9:37 PM

    OM gosh, I remember visiting your photo blog awhile back when you were pregnant and now I finally see pics of your little one! She is just adorable! You do such a great job capturing her! I’m following you girl on bloglovin’! Can’t wait to visit with you more :o)

  • Reply
    Melissa
    July 17, 2012 at 9:49 PM

    wow, a post about swimming seemed to spark quite the debate on non-swimming things! i will say, these photos make me miss warm weather soooo much. i’m a bit tired of NZ winter, i must say. and dying to take jackson in the pool although i’m also dreading it since i don’t know what it will do for his eczema. and also, just to chime in… we never left riley with a babysitter (hardly even our parents!) because we just didn’t want to, and now at two she is perfectly happy and well adjusted, has no problems staying home with out parents (although we still rarely leave her). We’re like you… we love time with our kids, and my husband and i enjoy each other’s company and being together WITH our kids, and our marriage isn’t suffering without regular date nights!!! Everybody is different and needs different things to be happy and make their marriage work, and nobody knows better than you. 🙂

  • Reply
    Lorraine
    July 18, 2012 at 5:35 AM

    Another great post Elena! Lexi’s little swimsuits are all super cute. She is getting more adorable every time I see a new picture of her, you must be so proud!

    Keep up the great work.

  • Reply
    Jade
    July 18, 2012 at 1:40 PM

    Lexi is very adorable 🙂

    I do find it interesting that you say time alone with your husband isn’t a priority. Wasn’t it you that said your own parents marriage failed because your mother put you and your sister ahead of him?

    • Reply
      Elena @The Art of Making a Baby
      July 18, 2012 at 1:49 PM

      I said we don’t mind spending time together with Alexis. That’s different.
      My mom’s story is a lot more complicated than that. My dad should have helped my mom raise us the way Andrew does with Alexis.
      The blame is not on my mom, it’s squarely on my dad. Their marriage could have been saved by ignoring us and focusing on my dad but at the time he really didn’t deserve that. So my mom did the only thing any mother would- busted her ass to provide for the family, supporting my dad and raising two kids, giving us more attention than most moms do.
      Once my dad shaped up, it was too late to save it, since the feelings were ruined. She stayed with him for 20 years because of us.

  • Reply
    Florence
    July 20, 2012 at 3:00 PM

    Love your bathing suit! Where is it from?

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